Juice Fast - What I've Learned

For ten full days, I consumed nothing but plant matter in a liquid state. It was an experiment, and a rather extreme one in theory but I came off with all sorts of Mythbusters-style data about my diet, my lifestyle, and my digestive tract that are only clear in retrospect. I learned an awful lot about what juicing is, and almost more importantly what it is not.

Without further ado, let us begin:

Juice, not juicing, makes your bowels go boom

One thing that always seems to come up when people talk about juicing is that folks will spend the first two days in the bathroom. It makes perfect sense as your body suddenly has an influx of matter-light nutrients that are quite rapidly absorbed in your system. The effect is like a nitrous oxide shot to a race car, not so much "washing" you out as much as just speeding the process along the whole line without anything new coming down the pipe.

The fact that I drink fresh juice regularly likely blunted that explosive result for me. I do recall when I first started drinking juice (usually instead of breakfast) there were some irregularities in my body that took some days to settle down. If you've never had pure juice before, or have a diet heavy in carbs or animal proteins, going to pure juice will have a definite affect on how much bathroom reading you get done.

After the first few days, however, it might be slower and lighter than normal. After all, there is very little mass going into your body, so don't expect too much to come out.

It's all in your head

There was a great line in the Bushido code I think sums it up: "If you find yourself in a sudden rain do not run to cover, you will still get wet, as long as you accept that fact, you will not suffer." Of course, they were talking about dying in a bloody spray of glory, but it applies to juice fasting as well.

The main strength of the fast is its pure binary simplicity. Is it juice? Then don't drink it. It's something you really have to accept as gospel at the get-go of the effort. Once you get that implanted in your psyche, the rest is surprisingly easy. Yes, I still desired food, but I also desired large stacks of money served to me on the nude bodies of supermodels hang-gliding over a pool filled with martinis. By accepting the juice diet, I still felt some temptation, but found it easy to resist both.

It's hardly "fasting"

I get why it's called fasting. Fasting implies some sort of denial, which this clearly is. But it also implies a sort of constant hunger, something that couldn't be farther from the truth.

Most sites and sources I found recommended drinking about a gallon of juice a day and I think I may have hit that mark once. A gallon is a LOT of juice. It doesn't seem like much, but you have to keep in mind that we're not talking about clear, refined, filtered juice here. Fresh juice has body and substance, and I found myself quite full after finishing a 24 oz. cup of green from Whole Foods. Sure, it only held me over for about an hour or two, but even 3 large mason jars (about 3 quarts) was enough to get me through the day.

Pay attention: it's the WORLD that's the problem!

What might be the single greatest thing learned from my juice fast was getting to see where food falls in my life. I realized that a lot of my relationship with food is dictated by habit or situation, rather than by need or even want. At a sports bar? I'll have a giant beer and wings. Watching a movie at home? I'll have a bottle of wine and ice cream. Cookies or cupcakes at work? I'll just keep stuffing them in my mouth hole thank you. 

Juice fasting immediately puts you on the outside of the American dietary culture. Keep an eye on your friends, your spouse, your co-workers. See when they eat and when they expect you to eat. It can be quite interesting to learn you don't really have to eat in most of these situations. It's quite shocking just how much food and eating is present in the modern world, and a juice diet is a great way to sideline yourself and get a better view of the field. Ten days might not be long enough to break a habit if you keep snacks in your desk at work, but it helps identify the outliers.

Don't go crazy

I decided early on that I'd be doing a "strict" juice diet. That meant all juice and only juice of the juice by the juice shall never perish from the earth. I cut out all non-juice anything, with my only non-juice indulgences being the occasional non-caffinated herbal tea (Moroccan Mint from Austin's own Zhi Tea is my personal fave) and enough water to give a fish pause. 

The two major casualties of this decision: coffee and my allergy medication.

Now the fact that I purposefully turned town allergy medication in central Texas is grounds to declare me legally insane, but thankfully the weather was on my side. There was little wind and a decent amount of rain, so aside from a few sneezes I didn't suffer nearly as much as I thought I would. Some say that juice fasting helps cures allergies (as it did for our Aussie friend in the movie) but I don't think 10 days is enough to really reprogram my immune system. 

Of course it goes without saying that if you're on any medications or have any sort of anything (and even if you don't) do this under the supervision of a doctor. I didn't but that's because I'm a moron and my wife is a firm believer of the "walk it off" school of medicine. Since I have no health concerns or any sort of medications I am on, I took the risk of suffering something terrible.

The lack of coffee was the true source of my suffering.

In retrospect I shouldn't have gone cold turkey. The allergies mixed with the caffeine headaches were not a pleasant way to start my week, and thankfully they started to fade once I got back to work. What I should have done is moved to tea, strong black tea of some sort but something to take the edge off. Maybe even less coffee. Or the same amount of coffee.

Costco is your friend

The art of juicing does take some time to get right. Greens are a vital part of any juice fast, and while they have a good deal of flavor they do result in very little actual liquid. On the flip side are veggies like cucumbers and celery have a lot of liquid in them but not a great deal of either flavor or heavy nutrient value. Also, none of those taste very good.

Even if you manage to find some ambrosia-like combination of flavors, you'll need a good deal of staples to get through only a few days of juicing. Most basic veggies can be bought in large quantities at big box stores like Costco or Sam's Club, and doing so will save you not only money but a good deal of stress. You can always toss some more greens in, and if you find yourself a bit short on liquid then a few stalks of celery or grapes will fill it out nicely.

By the way, a 5 pound bag of carrots might outlast your fast. They make a good deal of juice, and the ones I got were simply gigantic. These were organic!

The only things I did not get in bulk was the occasional luxury item, like Meyer lemons or pomegranates, or something that I never used in the same volume like ginger. Those can be pricey, but they also go much further in your juice.

Bottom line: it's not so hard, but be smart

Ten days of juice fast came and went with little fanfare. I took it rather casually, but it did take some hard decisions from time to time (like going to an Italian restaurant and not shanking my friends) but the actual act itself was surprisingly easy. A bit of willpower, some planning and the occasional executive decision and I made it the full ten days without any incident.

It was quite helpful to have a support system, in this case my loving Wife. She was totally supportive of my efforts provided that she didn't have to participate. Juicing does force you out of the normal routine of eating and then eating again, so having someone who's not juicing helps give you and anchor to society. Granted, you'll have to still keep to the sidelines and sip your juice in shame, but at least you're not sipping in shame at home alone in your underwear on the first two days of your juice fast.

They key is also to listen to your own body. This sort of thing will affect each person very differently depending on your lifestyle and overall health, but keep in mind that the goal is health and not harm. Stay hydrated, stay sated, and don't push your limits. Make sure you cover the basics like sleep and breathing, and you'll have a grand old time.